I've been asked a lot about why I decided to share my story at 24. Here is a little video I did with Broken Yellow to explain...
Video: Gender and Infrastructure
Last year I visited the Inter-American Development Bank to talk Gender and Infrastructure.
From there, I've now become a Gender Ambassador for the IDB - which is an awesome honour (and gives me licence to talk about gender related stuff all the time! woo!)
We recorded this video about why gender is important for infrastructure design... hope you enjoy!
Podcast Chat with the Co-Op Bookstore!
Had the awesome opportunity to chat with the Co-Op Book Podcast!
Have a listen here:
Why write a memoir at 24?
Well, it's not just about me. Really...
“t is not in fact, really about me at all. It is about the experience of growing up migrant and Muslim in a world post 9/11, and the fact that I went from being a brown girl who wore funny clothes to the ‘face of all that was evil’ almost overnight. It is about trying to make sense of two different cultures, different expectations, different ideologies – embracing the identity of the third culture kid.”
The Eye of the Storm...
I'm sitting at my desk, my Sudanese jalabeeya sticking to my skin in the Perth heat.
The voice of Meg Mac streams out of my speakers and soothes my soul.
Hey y'all. I'm in the Eye of the Storm.
These are the last few hours before 'Yassmin's Story' hits the world, for real. It's a project I've been working on for months, and is truly a work of love, blood, sweat and tears. It wouldn't have been possible if not for so many people who believed in me, believed in the idea, believed in the story. Clare, Meredith, Lex in particular - thank you, from the bottom of my heart.
I don't know how to feel. I am in this transition space, and just felt an urge to write, to somehow make sense of this moment, so here we are. Perhaps I will look back in a few hours, a few days or even years and laugh at my naivety, at my incomprehension of what is happening around me, but for so long this has just been my little project, something I've talked about and worked on but never really believed would happen...
Now it has.
I am overwhelmed, unsure, excited, apprehensive and cautious. I am wary of details of my life becoming public, while at the same time knowing I have consciously chosen to do so in order for change to occur, inshallah. I am hopeful that the stories will inspire, influence, impact... or at least just make people laugh.
You know what? At the end of the day, this is the hardest thing I have ever done. I can't comprehend it yet, but the one thing that I do truly believe is that if it somehow impacts the life of even one person, then it is all worth it, inshallah.
May Allah's peace and blessings be upon us all, inshallah.
Everything - is - gonna - be - alright.
Lots of love, and see you on tour!!!
WE DID IT!
Looking for an EA (Start ASAP)
Hey y'all,
So I've bitten the bullet and hired some people to help/enable/get stuff sorted/do things better than I ever could. One of these positions is that of an Executive Assistant (EA).
The wonderful lady in that role has been AMAZING over the past few months but is now moving on to bigger and better things (just how I like it! Empowerment! #Slay!).
As such however, I am now looking for a new EA. Perhaps it could be you?
Please send applications ASAP to yas@yassminam.com.
The position description can be found here (click through). This is a paid position.
Lots of love...
To stop me from doing this sort of thing. Which happens. To the best of us...
Fear must not divide us.
I haven't written for a while as I have been run off my feet with a few projects - keep up to date via my FB here.
However, the attacks in Paris have given me cause to write a quick note.
We cannot let fear divide us.
Whatever your foreign policy agenda, no matter how badly the immigration officers may treat you, or how uncomfortable life becomes on public transport, let us not turn that into hatred. Because then, who wins?
I am just about to jump on a plane to the U.S. where I imagine borders will be tight. This is what I will be reminding myself of.
There is no 'us' versus 'them', we cannot afford to think that way. Life is not that easy and straightforward. In some cases though, there is clearly and 'wrong' and a 'right', and there is no 'right' that includes killing of the innocent.
Islam does not allow for killing innocents. Ever. Full stop.
Our Prophet Mohammed (SAW) did not turn to violence unless it was in self defence and even *then*, he constantly chose to forgive rather than inflict further pain.
Even the colonisers, when invading Muslim countries back in the day, thought Muslims were 'too lenient'. Governor Hastings, along with his Governor-General of India Charles Cornwallis, felt like Islamic law allowed people to escape punishment too easily, complaining that Sharia was “founded on the most lenient principles and on an abhorrence of bloodshed”.
Why bring that up? To remind us that we do not have to be steeped in blood to be strong.
The world we live in can sometimes feel like it is more unstable, more violent and that the violence is becoming more indiscriminate. We cannot let that feeling override us, because that is what causes further division and allows the space for vitriol and hatred to occur. Acts of prejudice are at the bottom of the Pyramid of Hate, and we cannot afford for our society to make it's way back up that ladder.
We have to find it within ourselves to be kind. We have to find it within ourselves to forgive those who may look at others with fear and see it as an opportunity to build bonds of compassion, to find what unites us rather than what divides. We owe it to our ancestors and to society to ensure we play a part in making the world a safer place and not sit in the ease and comfort of hate.
If we all try to find a way to unite, particularly in a way which is inclusive, in the words of Kendrick:
"We gon be alright!" (inshallah)
#ParisAttacks
Take this moment to also remember those in other nations who suffer from being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Khair inshallah. #Lebanon #Syria #Beirut #Sudan #Iraq #DRC
Speech on Gender @ the Inter-American Development Bank
The Inter-American Development Bank (IDB) is holding its Transport Knowledge Week and I was extremely honoured to be asked to speak on the topic of gender and bias as it applies to such a technical field. The program is a two day forum bringing together 50 transport specialists from the Latin America and the Caribbean region and this year they are discussing how to improve project´s impacts by including gender equality objectives.
In this excerpt (filmed with the amazing Emma and Lucy from Broken Yellow!) it is explained why it is important to take gender into account when designing infrastructure and the value in creating an inclusive environment for colleagues of all genders.
What do you think? Enjoy!
The research quoted is from:
Hatmaker, D. M. (2013). Engineering Identity: Gender and Professional Identity Negotiation among Women Engineers. Gender, Work & Organization, 20(4), 382-396.
More interesting research on this topic can be found in this report:
Powell, A., Bagilhole, B., & Dainty, A. (2009). How Women Engineers Do and Undo Gender: Consequences for Gender Equality. Gender, Work & Organization, 16(4), 411-428.
Get into it! Fascinating Stuff!
Transport knowledge week @ the iadb
Guest Blog: A Matter of Being Heard
This is a guest piece by Iman Salim Ali Farrar, the young Muslim lady who is the 2015 YMCA NSW Youth Parliament Premier. I'm honoured to have her poignant contribution to the blog.
I was fortunate enough to be elected by the youth delegates as Youth Premier of Queensland in 2008 and it fantastic to see Iman in a similar position this year in NSW. Chyeah!
IMAN SALIM ALI FARRAR
There comes a point in the hub-bub of everyday politics when the discussion on real issues which face our vast communities seems to give way to disjointed partisanship and strong-arm showmanship. Thus, this shows a neglect of the voices which often need to be heard most. Certainly, the lack of balanced and nuanced debate surrounding such issues by our nation’s leaders has heightened deep visions, sensationalized trivialities and disenfranchised many, particularly the young, from mechanisms of political institutions.
Now, it is with great humility and respect that I was provided with the opportunity to lead this year’s NSW YMCA Youth Parliament as the NSW Youth Premier for 2015. The Youth MPs I had the pleasure of working with are some of the most intelligent, outspoken, talented and politically active people I know; I could not be more honoured, and I thank them sincerely for entrusting me to lead them.
Throughout my life, I have lived across four continents and five different countries; I have traveled and I have been immersed in several different cultures, however, due to this, I was never able to fully settle and develop any deep attachment to call anywhere home. I will not deny that this gave me a realisation beyond what I was exposed to in my home and local area – it showed me the different governing systems, the different values and the inherently different lifestyles that came with that. It developed the value that I now have for the many cultures of the world, but I have never felt more at home then I do here in Sydney, Australia. I may have a British accent, I may not have been born here, but my Australian identity is as strong as anyone else’s. I am a migrant, in fact, besides the indigenous, we are all migrants to Australia, and we have all adopted this place as our home. When you see me, you wouldn’t guess that I am half English, and half Malaysian, that I speak 3 languages and can read and write in another two which I do not understand, and that I am a very, very passionate young woman who will not stand to be discriminated against, especially based on my identity as a Muslim or a woman. I may not look or fit any stereotype of anything that you may have in your mind – but against all the odds; of both a society often fearful of Islam and of a society that does not value the opinions of the youth nearly as much as they should, I am still proud to call Australia my home.
Iman with QLD's Former premier, Anna Bligh. Reppin' QLD!
I preach for diversity. For it to be fully accepted in society, in managerial positions, in educational standards, and in State and Federal Parliament, and for it to not be a point of discrimination. I believe that it is about time that our Parliament reflects the diverse and multicultural nature of our population. I preach for diversity to be realised, for our true multicultural society to reflect on this notion of diversity, and for our youth and broader society to have their say on matters that affect them, on issues that they have the ability to put forward resolutions for. As a woman, it fills me with great joy to see that 60% of the participants in this year’s NSW Youth Parliament are women. It is even more impressive that out of the Government Executive in the Legislative Assembly, 4 out of 5 of the executive positions are filled by some of the most inspirational young women I have met in my life who have such drive and passion for positive change in our society. Not only are we challenging the statusquo represented in current state and federal parliament through closing the gap of women in powerful positions, but we also encompass the multicultural nature of New South Wales that we have all come to embrace.
Through grassroots’ apolitical forums such as YMCA NSW Youth Parliament, the voices of this State’s young leaders are allowed to cut through much of the clutter and put into creating legislation and open debate regarding the issues facing their own communities as well as broader society. I believe that it is pivotal to acknowledge that this is not a matter of small significance. Rather, the Youth Parliament program kindles that political awareness and superb quality integral to the next generation of our states’ leaders – ensuring the future burns even brighter than the past.
And who said we, the youth, don’t have a voice?
It is simply a matter of being heard.
--
This is a guest piece by Iman Salim Ali Farrar, the young Muslim lady who is the current 2015 YMCA NSW Youth Parliament Premier. I'm honoured to have her contribution to the blog and stoked to see more and more young Muslim women doing awesome things and leading with compassion, integrity and vision.
Iman Salim Ali Farrar
On Sabrina & Blasts from the Past
When I was 13, I read a book that changed my life (so dramatic!)
"It was a book about Sabrina the Teenage Witch..." the tale always begins.
Sabrina, in her infinite wisdom, had erased herself from existence, but could see what life was like without her. Her aunts didn't talk to each other because she wasn't there to broker peace, her boyfriend was in jail because he had gone off the tracks without her guidance and her best friend was dating an abusive guy because Sabrina wasn't around to help show her she was worth more.
In short, Sabrina understood that even though she might recognise the impact she had on the people around her, every interaction she had - her very existence - changed the world around her, for the better.
I decided, at 13, to make that my mantra. Life was to become about making every interaction one that would have a positive impact on the world around me.
Easier said than done, of course.
Sure, it is the ideal framework to have in mind, but it can often fall to the wayside while going through #life, or simply struggling through life's challenges. When things are busy or challenging, it become much more difficult to consciously be thinking about the impact we are having on those around us. Instead, we are focused on how to take the next step, how to get through every moment.
After graduating from University, I spent near-half a year with my family in Sudan, attending the International University of Africa to learn formal Arabic. It was a crazy experience and was actually the inspiration to start this blog - many of my early blog pieces were about trying to understand what was going on around me.
The classes I attended were made up of young women from various parts of Africa, often mothers who brought their kids to class and who lived incredibly different lives to mine. It was eye opening, enriching, enlightening - but also, incredibly tough. I tried to be myself in a world that had a very strong view on what I 'should be' - and I wasn't playing by the rules. I had to learn how to navigate a new system I didn't quite fit in, and so often disconnected.
I made friends, some of whom I still occasionally talk to today, but unfortunately, I lost contact with most of my new friends and colleagues. That is why a recent email in my inbox caused me an unreasonable amount of joy:
“Salam alaikum dear Yassmin...welll I really don’t know where to start from coz I’m excited. I thought I should share my excitement with you coz you are someone I have always been convinced is of great intellect and life touching potentials, even though I only met you for a short time and we got to talk a few times. ”
Oh! Interesting, I thought. My curiosity was piqued.
“Yes! we’ve met before and that’s the more reason why I’m excited...sometimes in early to mid 2012 we were at the same institute of Arabic language (ma’ad lugha al arabiyyah) at International University of Africa, Khartoum, Sudan.
We weren’t actually classmates but we’ve had the opportunity to study together at one of those instances where the teachers have to merge students together for some classes. It was on one of those occasions we met and we talked not so extensively, but heartily. You might not remember who I am, but I do vividly remember you, such that when I randomly watched your TED talk on YouTube while just surfing the internet, I knew it was you even without remembering your name, I just knew it was you...that’s how people with infectious personality, high intellect and extremely inspiring leave me feeling even if we’ve only known each other for a few seconds.
You might be wondering why I’m excited. I’m excited because since I stopped seeing you around at ma’ad lugha, it would cross my mind once in a while what you are up to where ever you are. Seeing you on TED and reading a few other things about you, and realizing that you’re doing great for yourself, and not just that, you’re also inspiring others to bring out the best in themselves is just amazing.
I’m really proud and greatly inspired by you. Keep up the good work and Allah is your strength.
We might not have so many things in common, but like you said in one of your talks, “you want to do so many things, that at the end of the day, you just want to be useful”.
I think we share that in common, and you are one of my inspirations to work even better at achieving that goal. I also have a few things going on in my life, if you do not mind, I could share them with you.
Take care. ”
That is what makes it all worth it.
That, ladies and gentlemen, is the spice of life. To know that our actions are having an impact on others in ways we cannot even imagine, is incredibly humbling. To know that a conversation that you have - a single conversation - can be remembered, is powerful, because it reminds us of the potential of every.single.interaction.
We must never forget that.
I recently met a guy who left his high paying job as a lawyer to start his dream company. When I asked him why he studied law, his response was further proof of the impact of small moments.
“Well, at my speech night someone - an important someone - asked me what I was planning to do with my life. I told him, and he said “No son, you’re going to study law and commerce and do this, this and this...” and that’s what I did!”
Now that 'important guy' may not even remember the conversation he had with a young graduating student, but his comments shaped this man's life.
What keeps me going? Knowing that any of the conversations I have, the smiles I share and the paths I cross has the potential to be life changing - for me, or for those around me.
The same applies to you! Without realising it, you could be giving confidence to the next Mohammed Ali, helping out the next Malala or giving the nudge needed for the next Elon Musk.
How exciting is that?!
"Emails like **this** is why we do what we do. Though it's exhausting, sometimes demoralising and not always fun and games, working for positive change and..."
ICYMI: Guardian Article: "I work on a rig..."
In case you missed it, here is an article I wrote recently on the Guardian. Yeh, the title is a little click-baity, but have a read anyway...
I work on an oil rig with 150 men. You wouldn't believe the stories.
Being a female in a male-dominated workforce makes for being a subject of endless fascination.
The most common question immediately after the big reveal is an awed, “Oh, but what is it actually like working with all those blokes?”
Sometimes, it’s fun just sharing the war stories.
“Oh mate,” I’ll tell them.
“Working on the rig is like, another world. On land, I am usually the only chick out of 30 or so. Sometimes you would have one other girl on site, but almost never more than one. Offshore, it’s party time! You’re looking at maybe four women out of 150? It’s crazy. It’s awesome. You should hear some of the jokes.”
At this point, I might lean forward, and in whispered tones for effect, share what I call the “crazy rig conversations”.
“There was this one guy, right – he was just straight out about it,” I say. “He was like, ‘I’m a chauvinist, OK? I’m the last of a dying breed. Let me just say what I want to say!’
“I’ll tell ya, some of the rest is unrepeatable in good company! Get a bunch of blokes together and anything goes. I reckon I don’t even hear all the good stuff, although they do eventually get used to you.”
Truth be told, however, that is not the whole picture. In fact, like anything, working as a female in a male-dominated industry is all of the things – challenging, difficult, fun, rewarding, unexpected and above all, completely subjective.
What is fascinating is how the experience of women in industry reflects the broader expectations of and attitude towards women in our society. There is a general acceptance that gender diversity is a “good” thing, but some occasional reluctance about “forcing” a change, particularly when affirmative action is considered.
The broader questions around roles of men and women in society also linger. The traditional norm of men as the breadwinners and women as the homemakers in our society has definitely been challenged, but what does the alternative look like? Are women the homemakers and the breadwinners? Are men the homemakers? What does this say about our construction of masculinity and femininity? There are more questions than there are answers, and being in an industry with mostly men, it is fascinating to see the dynamics play out.
There are generational differences in the ideologies and this also varies based on industry, location (in the field or in the office) and education level (management versus engineers versus operators). Interestingly, it doesn’t play out like you would expect.
A recent conversation with a young engineer who started in the mining industry brought this to the fore.
“I’ve had a great time!” she said, almost in surprise. “I was expecting it to be rough and the men to be mean, but they’ve all taken care of me and shown me around.”
Indeed, quite often there can be advantages to being a woman in a male-dominated industry. People know who you are, you will always be remembered (which is a double edged sword) and the lads, particularly the operators, enjoy talking to a woman, particularly after being around only blokes for weeks on end. The older generations of men in the field (the baby boomers) are often happy to take on the role of “teacher” for a younger female, so a lot can be learnt. The younger men (gen Y) have grown up in a world where they have been told men and women are generally equal, and accept that as the status quo.
The lads on the land rig built a sleigh for Christmas...
However, as we see in other industries, those benefits don’t necessarily trickle up, and there are still some structural and societal barriers that make it difficult for women. Scratching beneath the surface allows the unconscious bias to become evident. Taking the case of engineers, for example, it can be argued that female engineers are often highly visible as women, but invisible as engineers. There is an acceptance in equality but not always a true belief in it.
It may be the baby boomer is happy to teach but finds it difficult to accept direction from a younger female until she has proven her worth beyond all doubt. It may be the residual resentment in the young male engineers that a female engineer is more sought after by a company with a diversity policy. Those biases are more difficult to challenge and reflect the broader societal attitudes that are yet to change.
Some of the structural barriers are simply due to the nature of the industry which has been designed around men, due to its history. Whether that is because it’s seen as difficult to hold down a Fifo roster while pregnant or with young children, or that many time-consuming and demanding project management roles are given to engineers at a time when many women are having kids and may not necessarily have the support at home, some male-dominated workplaces are, unsurprisingly, still designed around men.
It is not all doom and gloom however. Times are changing, and are changing more rapidly than ever.
There are more and more examples of “non-traditional” families, where duties are shared and unusual support networks created. There are more women entering the science, technology, engineering and maths spaces, although there should be more. There are more companies with obvious diversity policies and that encourage women and cater to their needs. Things are looking up, it just takes time.
Overall, when it comes to women in male-dominated workplaces, the legislative change has been made. That battle has been won. The question is now about social change. We have to decide what we want our society to look like when we have true social acceptance of equality and access to opportunity, and then each and every one of us has to pitch in and create that reality.
In the meantime, I will continue to revel in sharing the war stories.
Him.
He sat across from me and asked.
Does Allah talk to you?
Do you hear him?
What do you pray about?
Does he answer your prayers?
I don’t even know what I said, but what a question indeed.
I didn’t know how to articulate it, and I don’t know if I ever will.
I didn’t know how to say that knowing Allah is there, all the time, that was all I ever needed to know.
That I hear him in music that moves, see him in the outline of mountains against the sky.
That my mortality frightens me, an intense fear that I may not be doing enough… a fear that my life is too easy, a fear that these blessings are in fact my hardships, and that I am failing the tests.
That sometimes, not very often, but sometimes...
I buckle. Doubled over, during sujood. Tears not merely from my eyes but from somewhere deeper, racking me raw because I am so humbled to be in His presence, Subhanallah.
My heart begs Him to guide me, to forgive me, to use me, to save me from myself and my own weakness.
Because I am oh so weak, and without His blessings, I am nothing.
“And how could we not place our trust in God, seeing that it is He who has shown us the path which we are to follow?’ ‘Hence, we shall certainly bear with patience whatever hurt you may do us: for, all who have trust [in His existence] must place their trust in God [alone]!’” [14:12]
It's a little frightening, writing so publically about religious faith, particularly to an Australian audience. We are not comfortable with it, and often I think that my secular friends are surprised by how much Islam means to me, particularly on a spiritual level.
Politics aside, Ramadan is fast approaching, and it is a time for reflection. It is time for that spiritual (and painful caffeine!) detox. It is a month to remind ourselves of our temporary nature, and what we are living for.
What is it that we live for?
Well, each of us has to answer that alone...